| Pages in topic: < [1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9] > | 校对/审需要怎样的资格?此例的"校"并不添花 Thread poster: redred
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redred 
China
Local time: 17:57
English to Chinese
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TOPIC STARTER
Work Report 2008
The year 2008 was eventful with financial crisis breaking out, economic situation withstanding severe difficulties at home and abroad, trust environment and market condition being harsh, license renewal for the company meeting obstacles, and trust business almost going backward or being suspended. Under such a circumstance, we held steady operation and renovation, made positive endeavor, and fulfilled certain achievements.(其他人的校)
Here I outline thre... See more Work Report 2008
The year 2008 was eventful with financial crisis breaking out, economic situation withstanding severe difficulties at home and abroad, trust environment and market condition being harsh, license renewal for the company meeting obstacles, and trust business almost going backward or being suspended. Under such a circumstance, we held steady operation and renovation, made positive endeavor, and fulfilled certain achievements.(其他人的校)
Here I outline three points on my work in 2008: first, I was full of hand attribute to managing such many departments; second, I developed business in all aspects, accomplished better achievement under difficulty, and created foundation for the company’s sustainable development; third, I strictly controlled risk, and so far no payment-related risk and management risk have occurred.(其他人的校)
冒出带ing的breaking out, withstanding, being, meeting, going是什么东西；such many departments，就算要改也应该用so；and so far no payment-related risk and management risk have occurred看着不顺，或者改为so far there aren’t (any) redemption risk and management risk occurred. 况且"兑付风险"是 http://www.cnjobo.com/News/52200882185952.html http://www.hxen.com/word/changyong/2008-12-17/63716.html
我最大的问题是要加the．
nigerose的版也溜．
[Edited at 2009-04-29 03:16 GMT] ▲ Collapse
| | | | nigerose
China
Local time: 17:57
Chinese to English
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| Henry Zhang
United Kingdom
Local time: 10:57
English to Chinese
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| 关于翻译的一个疑点：“公司换证”的“证” | Apr 29, 2009 |
这里的"证”如果翻译成licence的话，很可能让人觉得是营业执照。
但是一般公司更换营业执照是不可能遇到受阻这种情况的。
所以我想这里是针对证券公司的一种特殊的许可证，可能涉及到证券公司的营业范围。如果是这样的话，这里最好翻译成permit, 并且解释清楚究竟是什么permit.
另外还有"trust business almost went backward or suspended"
almost用在这里是否很合适呢？
[Edited at 2009-04-29 15:49 GMT]
| | | | Henry Zhang
United Kingdom
Local time: 10:57
English to Chinese
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| 我觉得Nigerose的理解很正确 | Apr 29, 2009 |
原文三个层次。
首先是困难，其次是困难导致了公司运营不畅，再其次作者点明就是如此困难的情况下，我们依然取得了如此的成绩，旨在邀功请赏或者突出自己多么不容易。
很符合国内八股的规范：）
nigerose wrote:
The year 2008 was really unusual for our company. The renewal of company license was frustrated and the trust business shrank or met with a standstill due to the unfavorable trust environments and terrible market conditions brought about by the breaking out of global financial crisis and the resultant severe economic situations at home and abroad. Under such circumstances
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说来有意思，这样的事我在一年内已先后遇到过两次！！经据理力争才未被‘扣款’。..
回头想来，作‘译审’的人也累，因为如不发表一些‘独到的东西’怎么显示水平‘高’？！
本人也不止一次‘有幸’作过‘审校’，通常会非常仔细确实相关细节，如不能确认，也定做一个说明。最简单的一次审定只用对原译文作了一句评价：This translator is truly professional and responsible!
| | | | wherestip
United States
Local time: 04:57
Chinese to English
+ ...
James_xia wrote:
说来有意思，这样的事我在一年内已先后遇到过两次！！经据理力争才未被‘扣款’。..
回头想来，作‘译审’的人也累，因为如不发表一些‘独到的东西’怎么显示水平‘高’？！
本人也不止一次‘有幸’作过‘审校’，通常会非常仔细确实相关细节，如不能确认，也定做一个说明。最简单的一次审定只用对原译文作了一句评价：This translator is truly professional and responsible!
James,
I can appreciate what you stated.
Yet in this case I don't think what you stated applies. I personally wouldn't pay a red cent for an editing job as demonstrated at the top of this thread. Of course the job would never have been assigned without going through the proper qualification process in the first place.
[Edited at 2009-04-30 13:36 GMT]
| | | | redred
China
Local time: 17:57
English to Chinese
+ ...
TOPIC STARTER
Henry Zhang wrote:
这里的"证”如果翻译成licence的话，很可能让人觉得是营业执照。
但是一般公司更换营业执照是不可能遇到受阻这种情况的。
所以我想这里是针对证券公司的一种特殊的许可证，可能涉及到证券公司的营业范围。如果是这样的话，这里最好翻译成permit, 并且解释清楚究竟是什么permit.
另外还有"trust business almost went backward or suspended"
almost用在这里是否很合适呢？
[Edited at 2009-04-29 15:49 GMT]
（下表已删一些公司名称）
“换证”是他们提供的词汇（要按照他们的），整体上词汇表是没什么大问题，从细节上要臻美，就有得挑了。“抵押贷款”是“mortgage loan”更为常见。
保管 custody
保留意见 qualified opinion
报表 statement
本金 principal
变动比率 variable rate
变相抽逃资本 spirit away capital contributions in disguised form
不良资产 non-performing asset
抽逃资本 spirit away capital contributions
传导机制 transmission mechanism
创新业务总部 New Business Department
存续项目 subsisting project
代理总裁 acting president
单一信托 single trust
单一信托 single trust
档 level
到期日 due date
到期日 due date
到期项目 due project
抵押贷款 secured loan
抵押贷款 secured loan
抵押房产 secured real estate
抵押房产 secured real estate
定量指标 quantitative index
定性指标 qualitative index
董事会 Board of Directors
短期债务 Short-term debt
短期债务 Short-term debt
法人代表 Legal representative
非经常性收益 nonrecurring profit
非现场监管 off-site regulation
非正常项目 extraordinary item
分红 dividend
分红量 bonus quantum
分立 division
风险敞口 risk exposure
风险评级 risk grading
风险提示 risk alert
风险头寸 risk position
风险与合规部 Risk & Compliance Department
风险与合规部 Risk and Compliance Department
风险预警 risk alert
付清 pay off
高管人员 senior executives
公司解散 dissolution
公司章程 Articles of Association (AA)
公司章程 Articles of Association (AA)
公司治理 corporate governance
股东会 Shareholders Meeting
股东会 shareholders meeting
固有业务 inherent business
关闭 close
关联交易 related transactions
合并 merger
合并（汇总） consolidation
合规 compliance
核销 write-off
后台 the back office
换发新牌照 re-license/license renew
换证 license renew
货币资金（余额） cash and bank deposit
激励机制 motivate mechanism
级 grade
集合信托 assembled trust
集合信托计划 assembled trust plan
集合资金信托 assembled funds trust
集中度风险 concentration risk
监管意见 regulatory opinion(s)
监事会 Board of Supervisors
监事会 board of supervisors
交付情况 delivery status
接管 takeover
借款人 borrower
借款人 borrower
金融衍生产品 financial derivative products
尽职调查 due diligence investigation
净利润 net profit
净资产收益率 profit margin on net assets
纠纷解决 dispute settlement
举报机制 complaint lodging system
离职审计 exit audit (departure audit)
离职审计 exit audit (departure audit)
立项审批 project examination & approval
流动比率 current ratio
流动比率 current ratio
流动负债（余额） current liabilities
流动负债（余额） current liabilities
流动性 liquidity
流动性 liquidity
流动资产（余额） current assets
流动资产（余额） current assets
履职情况 fulfillment of duties
乱集资 unwarranted pooling of funds
内部控制 internal control
年终奖金 Year End Bonus
培育 Incubation
赔偿准备金 indemnity reserve
平均生息资产 Avg Int Earning Assets
评级 grading
破产 bankruptcy
前台 the front office
强调事项段 explanatory paragraph
清算 liquidation
人均利润 profit per capita
融资类业务 financing business
三会一层 three boards and one management
审计部 Audit Department
审计存在的问题 audit findings
审计发现 audit findings
审计事项追踪器 Correction Issues Tracker
审计意见 Audit opinion
审计与风险控制委员会 Audit & Risk Control Committee
省财政资产信托 Provincial Financial Asset Trust
实收资本 paid-up capital
实业清理 industrial liquidation
实业投资 industrial investment
市场准入 market access
事后管理 feedback control
事前管理 feedforward control
事中管理 process control
收讫 received in full
受益人 beneficiary
诉讼保全措施 litigation conservatory measures
索赔 claim
特别事项揭示 disclosure of special events
同业拆入 interbank borrowing
投机倾向 intention of speculation
投资发展部 Investment & Development Department
拖欠的 in arrears
外部审计 external audit
违约金 liquidated damages
委员会会议召集人 Convenor
问责制度 accountability system
无保留意见 unqualified opinion
现场监管 on-site regulation
限制性条款 restrictive clauses
销售保证金 sales deposit
新股申购 new share subscription
新业务/创新业务 new business
信托报酬 trust revenue
信托期限 trust term
信托业务 trust business
信托业务一部 Trust Business Department No.1
信托余额 trust balance
信息传达机制 information transfer mechanism
信息披露 information disclosure
虚假出资 false capital contributions
延迟支付 deferred payment
业务核算 business accounting
一式两份 in duplicate
一套房产 one property unit
银监分局 CBRC branch office
银监会 China Banking Regulatory Commission （CBRC）
银监局 CBRC office
盈利能力 earning capacity
有偿集资 paid pooling of funds
增长率 growth rate
整改 rectification
整改意见 amendment opinion
指引 Guide
质押 pledge
中台 the middle office
自有资金 self-owned funds
总体评价 general comment(s)
职责分离 Segregation of Duties
[Edited at 2009-04-30 01:50 GMT]
| | | | redred
China
Local time: 17:57
English to Chinese
+ ...
TOPIC STARTER
nigerose wrote:
The year 2008 was eventful, financial crisis broke out, economic situation withstood severe difficulties at home and abroad, trust environment and market condition were bad, license renew for company met obstacle, trust business almost went backward or suspended. Under such a circumstance, we held steady operation and renovation, made positive endeavor, fulfilled achievement to some extent. (这是redred的译文)
The year 2008 was really unusual for our company. The renewal of company license was frustrated and the trust business shrank or even met with a standstill due to the unfavorable trust environments and terrible market conditions brought about by the breaking out of global financial crisis and the resultant severe economic situations at home and abroad. Under such circumstances......（这是Nigerose的译文）
事后诸葛亮的译文。从坛上其他贴子看到，Nigerose很喜欢一较高下呀，你做＂校审＂时兴许要推翻我的再重来（设计场景），而不敢奢望你增/减一词添色。
[Edited at 2009-04-30 02:23 GMT]
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nigerose
China
Local time: 17:57
Chinese to English
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redred wrote:
事后诸葛亮的译文。从坛上其他贴子看到，Nigerose很喜欢一较高下呀，你做＂校审＂时兴许要推翻我的再重来（设计场景），而不敢奢望你增/减一词添色。
[Edited at 2009-04-30 02:23 GMT]
实事求是讨论问题而已，没什么较高下的。
我基本上不做校审，做的话也就象你那个校审一样。校对费只有翻译费的一半，划的来吗。
| | | | redred
China
Local time: 17:57
English to Chinese
+ ...
TOPIC STARTER
nigerose wrote:
实事求是讨论问题而已，没什么较高下的。
我基本上不做校审，做的话也就象你那个校审一样。校对费只有翻译费的一半，划的来吗。
所以我也不敢奢望能从“校审”处获益，进而吸收别人长处、提高水平。人家的“校审”是"such many departments"，可数名词用such？
[Edited at 2009-04-30 03:27 GMT]
| | | | Henry Zhang
United Kingdom
Local time: 10:57
English to Chinese
+ ...
| 大家心平气和的讨论，不要伤了和气 | Apr 30, 2009 |
redred,你把你的译文贴出来给大家看，勇气可嘉。说实话我是没有这个勇气的。
翻译本来就不像数学物理一样有一个定式，所以有的时候大家有不同意见也是正常的。
我个人觉得nigerose对原文的理解稍微比您好一些，他的翻译更有层次一点。虽然第二句话太长了，还可以再打磨一下。
| | | | nigerose
China
Local time: 17:57
Chinese to English
+ ...
Henry Zhang wrote:
我个人觉得nigerose对原文的理解稍微比您好一些，他的翻译更有层次一点。虽然第二句话太长了，还可以再打磨一下。
如果是科技文章，一点都不算长。在其他文体中可能长了点，可以把due to 独立成句，试“打磨”如下：
The year 2008 was really unusual for our company. The renewal of company license was frustrated and the trust business shrank or even met with a standstill. This was due to the unfavorable trust environments and terrible market conditions brought about by the breaking out of global financial crisis and the resultant severe economic situations at home and abroad. Under such circumstances......
独立出来的This was due to一句解释公司碰到的问题的客观原因。
[修改时间: 2009-05-01 00:59 GMT]
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clifts
China
Local time: 17:57
English to Chinese
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nigerose的译文更好一些。中译英还是要用英语母语人士做翻译和审校工作，母语是汉语的人就不要尝试无用功了，能 稍微有点看得上眼的已经很少了，更别说做到非常好的水平。中国人还是下功夫搞好外译中，吃母语的饭，才是出路。
[修改时间: 2009-05-01 13:15 GMT]
[修改时间: 2009-05-01 13:15 GMT]
| | | | ysun
United States
Local time: 04:57
English to Chinese
+ ...
wherestip wrote:
我同意你说的. 就校审来讲, 我认为给你作审议的确实作得比较差. 似乎只企图将你原有的句子顺一顺. 但我本人觉得根本没有改到点子上, 还不如不改. 这种校审完全没有起到校审的作用.
我同意 Steve 的意见。虽然 redred 的译文尚有改进余地，但修改后的译文却并无多大改进。比较 redred 的译文和校稿者修改的译文之后，我发现主要改动如下：
1. 校稿者把某些短句改成了一系列的 -ing 结构。我认为这种结构可以适当地用一用，但一连串地用就有点过分。所以，我也觉得还不如不改。
2. 校稿者把 many departments 改为 such many departments，确实是画蛇添足。要改也应该是 "so many"。校稿者犯这种错误，说明基本功还不扎实。
3. 校稿者把“至今未出现兑付风险和管理风险问题”译为 “no payment-related risk and management risk have occurred”，是误解了原文的意思。原文的意思是（经“严格控制”后）在“兑付风险和管理风险”方面至今未出现问题。其实质是至今未出现问题，而不是至今未出现风险。风险是客观存在。如果风险不存在，那还用得着他去“严格控制风险”吗？
应该说原文就存在不少问题，从而给翻译带来一定程度的困难。例如，“2008年是不平常的一年，金融危机爆发，国内外经济形势严峻，信托环境和市场条件恶劣，公司换证受阻，信托业务几乎陷入萎缩或停顿”这个长句，应该分为几个短句，而不应该“一逗到底”。“我们坚守稳健经营与创新开拓并举”的后面应该加上“方针”或“原则”之类的词，否则就不通。 还有，“分管的部门多，工作量大”只不过是工作的性质或特点，并不是什么成绩。所以把它列为工作概要的第一条简直是让人莫名其妙。 从这种水平的原文出发，就不能对译文要求过高。翻译的任务是以另一种语言表达原文的意思，而没有义务在原文基础上加以提高和改善。校稿者的首要任务则是改错，而不是锦上添花，更不是画蛇添足。
[Edited at 2009-05-02 06:58 GMT]
| | | | redred
China
Local time: 17:57
English to Chinese
+ ...
TOPIC STARTER
http://bosicompany.diytrade.com/sdp/838581/4/main-4377990/0.html
这些东西不对照中文来校也没什么关系，因为是中国人的中译英，对中文不存在理解错误。（看原译的问题也不多。）
.....................................................................
Lose 30 lbs. per month with the fast diet pills.
... See more http://bosicompany.diytrade.com/sdp/838581/4/main-4377990/0.html
这些东西不对照中文来校也没什么关系，因为是中国人的中译英，对中文不存在理解错误。（看原译的问题也不多。）
.....................................................................
Lose 30 lbs. per month with the fast diet pills.
The most effective diet pills in the worldwide.
Only one pill a day and in 30 days you will see an amazing difference!
Feel better and look better, and never have to worry about having a serious weight problem again!(别人的译文)
......................................................................
Lose 30 lbs. per month with the fast diet pills.
The most effective diet pills worldwide.
One pill a day only, you will see an amazing difference within 30 days!
Feel better and look better, and never worry about having a serious weight problem again!(redred的校文）
......................................................................................
1. Speedy effectiveness. 2 capsules to 3-hour work-out, and one week can lose about 3-5kgs. 2 capsules per day, very easier and convenient.
2. Directional oil and fat reduction rather than body water reduction. Daidaihua herbal extract can directionally dissipates the excessive fat around thighs, waists, buns, arms and face in a quick period and drainages oil and reduce fat to curve ones figure rather than to reduce body water level to loose weight.
3. Weight loss and body shaping without shrinking females breast and helps to maintain a feminine curve and sculpt an exquisite figure.
4. A natural dietary supplement made from daidaihua herbal extracts that will control your appetite, lose weight faster without any side effects. no diet plan is needed and can beautifies ones skin, green botanical selective in particular. Not only it is free of toxicity and adverse influence, but also its distinguished blood flow enhancing and anti oxidant.(别人的译文)
......................................................................
1. Speedy effectiveness. 2 capsules are equal to 3-hour exercise, losing about 3kilo to 5kilo in one week. 2 Capsules taken per day, it is very easier and convenient.
2. Directional oil and fat reduction rather than body water reduction. Daidaihua herbal extract can directionally dissipate the excessive fat around thighs, waist, buns, arms and face in a short period of time and drain oil and reduce fat to curve one’s figure rather than to reduce body water level to lose weight.
3. Weight loss and body shaping without shrinking breast, helping to maintain a feminine curve and shape an exquisite figure.
4. A natural dietary supplement made from daidaihua herbal extracts which controls your appetite, losing weight faster without any side effect. No diet plan is needed, beautifying one’s skin, green botanical selected in particular. Not only is it free of toxicity and adverse influence, but also its distinguished blood flow that enhances the anti-oxidant. (redred的校文)
[Edited at 2009-05-02 08:31 GMT] ▲ Collapse
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